Friday, September 28, 2012

A Rant. A Recipe.

Sigh, I'm writing this post out of sheer frustration, in hopes that someday I'll look back on it and laugh.  A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about how I'd started running and completed my first 5K with the help of an awesome physical therapist.  Physical therapy had been going well and I even got word last weekend that I'd only need to come in for one more visit... finally success at last.  I was overjoyed, I was finally back to where I had been before my knee had started bothering me and I couldn't wait to be able to run farther and longer... I was also ridiculously excited to run the Susan G Komen 5K that was coming up this weekend.

It all started Tuesday - I decided I would go for a 2.5 mile run, then back off and run a mile later in the week before the race.  I laced up my running shoes and out the door I went, my first mile flew by, the second mile was a little harder, but no problems.  I rounded the corner to work my way back, about 1.5 miles into my run and I felt it.  My left knee, starting to hurt.  I stopped to walk and stopped to stretch on some stairs by a church, I thought about running again but knew in my heart that was a bad idea.  I started the long walk back as my knee continued to hurt.  Maybe this doesn't seem like a big deal to you, but I can sum up what was and is to me in three small words.

It was devastating.

That's right, devastating.  Not in a "I'm being a drama queen because I can't run" kind of way, but an "I feel like an absolute failure because I have been and always will be a diehard perfectionist kind of way" It took everything in me to resist the urge to cry as I limped down the sidewalk.  What a failure.  Maybe you've run tons of races and never had an injury or maybe you have.  It feels horrible to work towards something you want so badly and then physically not be able to do it.  It is awful.  When I think about the race tomorrow, I literally get teary.  So what if it's a 5K walk/run, it was supposed to be a 5K run for me and now it won't be.

So sure, they'll be plenty of other 5K's.  Everyone tells me it's not a big deal, to just go at my own pace and it will be fine. I won't get to push myself and since I won't get to push myself, I won't get to be proud of myself either.  They'll be other 5K's....but still.      

And for listening to my rant, I suppose that I'll leave you with a recipe....

Twice Baked Sweet Potatoes


3 large sweet potatoes
1 C 0% greek yogurt
1 C 2% shredded cheddar
1/4-1/3 cup green onions, chopped
2 tbsp bacon bits
1/4 tsp hot sauce (more to taste)

1. Wash and dry sweet potatoes, prick with a fork.  Pre-heat over to 400 degrees.  Cover potatoes in foil, baked ~45 minutes until soft.
2. Combine remaining ingredients in a small bowl, set aside.
3. Remove potatoes from oven, slice in half.  Scoop out insides of potatoes and combine with greek yogurt mixture. Decrease oven temperature to 375 degrees.
4. Stuff potatoes with greek yogurt mixture, top with additional cheddar and green onions if desired.
5. Bake for an additional 20-25 minutes until top are golden brown. 

What do you want to rant about?